Dear Friends,

Rituals and ceremonies are important, sacred times to help us process emotions and integrate truths. 

My youngest child is graduating from high school next week -virtually.  In the midst of finals, online learning due to a pandemic, graduation announcements, and college decisions, I am taking a moment for self and community care.

I woke up mad this morning.  When I get overtaken by emotion, I often use the same tools for myself that I do for my clients. So walked myself through the process of identifying and exploring being mad. It turns out there are plenty of real things happening in my life that would make this emotional response valid.  I tracked today’s feelings to my underlying grief about how this year is ending and the fact that 12 years of connection to a community system is done.  I have walked this education journey with both my children as an active volunteer and participant.  It feels anti-climatic as it ends with online zoom bombed banquets and physically distant celebrations.

We have rituals and ceremonies for a purpose.  They help us with transitions.  They facilitate the closing of liminal times and space.

As I was doing my walking meditation this morning I asked myself what I needed today to deal with all my disappointment, frustration, and grief. 

I realized that I needed to create a ceremony for myself.

I often co-create ceremonies for coaching clients and friends when they want to honor important times in their lives and especially those times that often go unrecognized.  Sometimes it’s just a personal ceremony done alone.  Often there are one or two trusted people invited to witness.

The ceremony I’m currently contemplating creating is to honor a chapter volume of my life that is complete.

As a parent volunteer, I’ve been behind the scenes for twelve years.  I didn’t do it for the accolades (really good thing since these are few and far between) I did it for all the children including my own. I’ve read to them, advocated for them, sat on boards, and helped shift policy to make things more equitable for all children and yes made cupcakes. Since I have contract work and owned my own business I have had the privilege and flexibility to do this unpaid work and now it is complete.

I have a story to tell – an honoring – a noticing – an acknowledgment of myself in this system and with countless other people, some of which have become life-long friends and some cherished acquaintances that I will miss.

Before I decide where those school volunteer hours are shifting, I am going to pause and savor the work that has been done.

This ceremony creation is a work in progress and takes into account an honoring of the work and a releasing and letting go.  

I know that it is vital to acknowledge these feelings, this time and the sacredness of connection and disconnection.

Taking a deep breath and letting it out with a sigh,

Christine

I love creating personal ceremonies for my clients to help them process events and emotions to honor their journey and to release what no longer serves.  Let me know if I can help you in anyway – you can connect with me here if you want to chat:  www.christinegautreaux.com

I’m also creating an offering through the Let’s ReImagine Life, Love and Loss Worldwide Festival for community care for parents of graduates:

https://www.facebook.com/events/234367831348681