Show notes –
Join Shannon and Christine as we chat about emotional and mental wellness with special guest Denise Alba of Brave Wellness Studio.
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The Trauma of Racism: Expert Strategies to Help Clients Heal – Register for free here: https://www.nicabm.com/program/a2-trauma-racism/?del=ToRTellaFriend
Breonna Taylor https://www.nytimes.com/article/breonna-taylor-police.html
Think & Grow Rich – https://www.amazon.com/Think-Grow-Rich-Napoleon-Hill/dp/1546962514/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1647468683&sr=8-1
Resmaa Menakem – https://www.resmaa.com/
S.C.A.D. – https://www.scad.edu/locations/atlanta
Women’s History Month – https://womenshistorymonth.gov/
Ways to connect with Denise: bravewellnessstudio.com
Denise’s social media handles:
@theinvertedtherapist
@bravewellnessstudio
https://www.bravewellnessstudio.com/wellness-retreats
Show Transcript –
NOTE: While it’s not perfect, we offer this transcription by Otter.ai for those who are hearing impaired or who don’t find listening to a podcast enjoyable or possible.
Christine Gautreaux 0:08
Let’s do this.
Shannon M. 0:08
Okay, ladies, welcome to our podcast. I am Shannon Mitchell, a black female, millennial entrepreneur, the founder of shallow glow, a handmade shea butter company. I am a champion for your self care, business care and intentional wellness.
Christine Gautreaux 0:25
And I am Christine Gautreaux, a white social justice advocate, an international speaker, coach and published author who helps you upgrade yourself in community care.
Shannon M. 0:35
Yes. And together we are women connected in wisdom, a podcast grounded in the eight dimensions of wellness. Welcome, welcome to our show.
Christine Gautreaux 0:44
And every week we like to get together and have intentional conversations about how to be wise in business relationships and wellness. Yeah, how do we do this thing called life? Right?
Shannon M. 0:55
It’s a lot. Yes. And we do it. We do it every day. We’re still here.
Christine Gautreaux 0:59
We do it. Let’s do a check in my friends. Like there’s a lot going on in the world right now. Yeah, how you doing?
Shannon M. 1:08
I am better than last week, you know, I appreciate you checking on me. You I heard the stress in your voice. And then I went to urgent care because they were stressing my body. And it was really interesting. Because the EKG for my heart came back normal. I said something’s still off, you know, so I still took the time to rest and taking space for myself resting a little bit taking some stuff off the to do list because it’ll be okay. I’m great.
Christine Gautreaux 1:35
Good. Good. I need you to be okay. Yes. You know, that’s one of the things we talked about on the show is holding each other accountable for our self care and our wellness because we have to sustain our self care in order to maintain Community Care. Absolutely. And as women, we tend to put other people ahead of ourselves. So let’s not do that.
Shannon M. 1:58
What about you? How are you doing?
Christine Gautreaux 2:00
I am dancing fast. But I’m dancing and having a great time. You know, it’s spring. So spring here in Georgia is gorgeous. For those of y’all that don’t know, and it comes with a lot of pollen. So you know, it’s kind of like when we talk about holding the grief in gratitude. You know, I’m holding the joy of spring and the Holy Moly pollen season is
Shannon M. 2:26
this point, I always forget about it. Because thankfully, it’s not something that I have to think about. And so I’m like, oh, yeah, mosquitoes and pollen are coming or they
Christine Gautreaux 2:37
are the daffodils and the woods and you know, it’s starting to look really pretty around here. Yeah, all the
Shannon M. 2:46
colors,
Christine Gautreaux 2:47
right? Oh, look. It’s I was telling somebody today staying with that garden metaphor. I’m like, I feel like my life in my work right now is just overgrown, really riotous gorgeous garden with all these flowers. But you know, you’ve got to make sure you trim some of it back. So this part doesn’t get overgrown or this part doesn’t, you know, take away all the oxygen from another part. Hot look at who is showing up today. Hello, friend. Hello. Hey, Courtney. Nice to see Courtney goal. This may be a secret. I don’t know if we’ve said it out loud yet that Courtney is one of our authors for our was she enacted in wisdom book. So y’all will be hearing more about that soon. So glad you’re listening today, friend.
Shannon M. 3:37
Yes. And thinking about the garden. I was thinking about one of our episodes of environmental wellness and how we were talking about being a flower. Right now it’s thinking about my hair color, how I dyed it, I thought it was going to be more orange than red. But then I picked the colors that I picked. And one day I had on yellow and I remember that my flowers are red sunflower, I said I literally turned into a red sunflower. How did that happen? So yes, I love
Christine Gautreaux 4:04
nails and there, too. You got
Shannon M. 4:08
a that’s something else. When we talk about physical wellness, I have these long nails, and they looked great. And I felt my nail under crack. And I said oh please take this off. Please take it off. So we had to do some gel, do some color and let it be shorter. So we don’t just look good, but we’re actually okay. Exactly. Well,
Christine Gautreaux 4:29
that’s a good point. We’re gonna be talking about emotional mental wellness today and I can’t wait to talk about this with our guests and but you know, such that we just don’t want to look good on the outside. We don’t want to have those cracks on the inside. Because yeah, I think so much our culture teaches us to do that. Right. And it’s like, whoa, whoa, we got to make sure the foundation is good. So we are solid behind it. Yeah, it’s I don’t know about you, but I’ve been doing some spring cleaning because, you know, it’s just that time of year, and I was laughing about it because you know, on virtual when we’re on just like most people, you know, this space in my office is clean. Somebody said the other day your office always looks so clean. I’m like, Yeah, cuz the cameras only pointed in one direction, right. But I took time to clean up my art supplies and my paperwork. And you know, I did, too. We talked about environmental wellness not too long ago and talking about making sure our space reflects who we want to be. And sometimes it’s not always easy because we are dancing so fast and paperwork flying and yes,
Shannon M. 5:42
yes. And the clothes are piling up. The Dairy Queen scoops, yeah.
Christine Gautreaux 5:47
Right. All those things, all those things? Well, should we introduce our guest and get her up here and start having this exciting conversation, which I’m looking forward to today. So ready for it? Y’all. Our guests today we have a lot to talk about. We were talking pre show and it was a good thing. We paid attention because we’re like, Oh, we got to go lie. Yeah. Our guest today is a holistic psychotherapist, which I can’t wait to talk more about what and who that is. And the CEO of brave wellness studio in San Diego. And we are so excited to welcome Denise Alba to our stage today. Hello.
Denise Alba 6:31
Hi. Dancing into it. I love you guys. I don’t dance. I’m gonna do my little shimmy.
Shannon M. 6:37
That’ll work. You gotta stay right here, right?
Christine Gautreaux 6:43
Well, I was dancing so fast. I missed a step. Because shaylen I didn’t have to give the definition or emotional mental wellness, you want to give it to our listeners?
Shannon M. 6:52
Absolutely. So today we’re talking about mental and emotional wellness. And according to the University of California, it is important to be attentive to both positive and negative feelings, and to be able to understand how to handle these emotions. emotional wellness also includes the ability to learn and grow from experience. emotional well being encourages autonomy and proper decision making skills.
Christine Gautreaux 7:18
Being grownups, I call it adulting.
Shannon M. 7:22
That’s, like the word should be bigger. adulting is to is you know, we need more letters in there because it’s so hot.
Christine Gautreaux 7:31
Well, Denise, tell us like what is a holistic psychotherapist?
Denise Alba 7:37
Yeah, we are looking at it all. I feel like oftentimes, therapists are just thought as like sitting back on the couch with their little like, how does that make you feel that type of thing. And we’re just like focusing on that piece. But I look at, you know, your your exercise levels, I look at nutrition, your sleep, supplements, all of that goodness, that really does take into consideration what else is going on? And how are maybe these things affecting your mental health?
Christine Gautreaux 8:13
I love that you look at the eight dimensions of wellness is what you look at. It sounds like you look at all the things we talked about. I was and I don’t know if you know this or not, because it’s not what I’m practicing now. But My background is as an MSW, and I’m trained as a clinical therapist. And so last night, the only reason I say that is because I jump on things that people are like, Why are you on that? It’s like, oh, cuz it’s my background. And that part of me wants to know what’s going on. I jumped on a thing last night called the trauma of racism, expert strategies to help clients heal. And I want to put that in our show notes. For folks who are listening. It was It was part one of a I think six part webinar. That is fantastic. And so that’s what it made me think of when you said that like, looking at the whole person in the systems that affect the whole person.
Denise Alba 9:06
Exactly. Yeah, even that book, the body keeps score is like a huge one. And that’s exactly what you’re talking about. So many things can affect us that we don’t necessarily always pinpoint or even take into consideration. And then when someone is sitting in front of you asking you these questions, you’re like, oh, yeah, maybe that has something to do with how I’m feeling.
Christine Gautreaux 9:29
Yeah, that made me think of it when you said lean back and go, because one of the things they said last night is client as therapist often we’re taught to be impartial. And there’s nothing impartial about racism. And when we’re impartial when a client or a person says that then that’s like, agreeing that that’s okay. And it’s not okay.
Shannon M. 9:52
Christine, when you say impartial, what do you mean? I don’t know if I understand the context of it.
Christine Gautreaux 9:57
Well, we’re taught to listen like Denise was saying, classically trained therapists are taught to listen and say, Well, how do you feel about that? Or how does that like not to give our opinion about whether that’s right or wrong? Not to, like, you know, back now this kind of date me, y’all because it’s been years like, since I’ve been in school, but like, we really didn’t talk about supplements, we because that would be like our opinion, that wouldn’t be like, if this is good or bad, you know, it’s, it’s an and I will say, the field is changing. And I’m so grateful Denise, like that there are holistic psychotherapist, and that we can look at, you know, I was trained as a systems gal, to look at the whole system. And I love that.
Denise Alba 10:45
Yeah, I think it’s so something that needed to change. And a lot of people, I feel like I’m having a hard time colleagues of mine as well, even with a little supplementing. When we know that, you know, obviously, with your training, there is additional training that we’ve all recommend for that right that you want to take before you just jump in there and say take this, but when you throw that into your practice, how just how much it changes people if they’re if they’re open to to that as well.
Shannon M. 11:13
Absolutely. And I was thinking this past week about Breanna Taylor, right? It’s it was, what, march 13, two years ago, the very beginning of COVID. And I knew I needed to go to therapy, Denise because my mom had just passed away right before COVID started in November. And so I said, Okay, COVID hat, my mom passed away. COVID Shut down the restaurant, what is going on? I had to move. I knew that again. I handled stuff pretty well, right. But let me talk to somebody. And I usually, in that I haven’t had a lot of therapists I do look forward to going back. But this time specifically, I said, let me ask for African American therapists. That didn’t happen, which I wasn’t necessarily upset about. And then Rihanna Taylor was murdered. And she sat back and asked a few questions and didn’t really say anything. And I said, it’s not the right answer. You know, because I realized after she was impartial, how Christine said it, that it actually affected me more than I realized that it did you know, and so when we talk about mental and emotional wellness, things in the environment that you hear, you know, news stories, or even stories about the people that you care about at work, like, Hey, this is going on. I know, I felt as you know, an empathetic person, I felt that pressure of if certain women are having certain issues at work, well, we can have those conversations. But now I might feel some type of way, because I might not have this issue. Or maybe I also have this issue and how do we address it professionally, while still giving ourselves the space to say, Hey, this is going on, and I’m not okay with it.
Denise Alba 12:49
Good for you for really, you know, knowing what you needed, and not just kind of sticking with it. A lot of people just stick with therapists because they feel like, oh, I don’t want I feel bad, you know, not? Not not they’re saying something or whatever that may be, but you really stood up for yourself and knew that you needed something else. And that that’s really huge. And it’s gonna help so much your growth and your journey. So you should be really proud of that, as well. Thank you.
Christine Gautreaux 13:15
Denise, I want to talk about your business a little bit before we do because we’re on this talk thick. And how do you pay? How does somebody how would you advise as a therapist, I would you advise for somebody to pick a therapist, like how do you tell your friends how to pick a good therapist?
Denise Alba 13:32
Yeah, read bios, and, you know, look them up, if they have social media, get to know them a little bit more, to see if they’re a good fit. A lot of us have, you know, bios and things like that, for example, that that videos or information that people can look at, and we talk about our specialty, making sure that that’s exactly what you’re looking for. And hop on those consoles, a lot of us have, you know, 10 minute phone consoles, not that you’re going to look you know, know exactly after 10 minutes, but you’re going to get a good feel for it, get it and get into those. And it’s also okay to say after the session. You know what, this isn’t working for me? Do you have another referral source? Or even look yourself?
Christine Gautreaux 14:13
Go I love that advocating for
Denise Alba 14:15
your health. Right?
Christine Gautreaux 14:16
Right. And your physical, mental well, like all of it, right? We are the inner authority and experts on ourselves. So Courtney says, I didn’t talk about it with my therapist. I just completely didn’t talk to her for a few weeks because she’s white, right? Who has some real? She didn’t she says I didn’t give her the opportunity to be impartial. That’s what you got. Right? Yeah. wasn’t trained in how to how to talk about this. How to trauma response, right. salutely
Shannon M. 14:51
So the nice with your new venue in California, right. Can you tell us Yes. Can you tell us a little bit about What you do, and how that pairs so well with your holistic psychotherapy?
Denise Alba 15:05
Yeah, so I just recently moved to a larger location, we opened up about two and a half, a little bit over two and a half years ago, brain Juana studio, which is a holistic psychotherapy and yoga studio in San Diego. And we just wanted to bring in that that physical aspect as well to the mental health and vocal list of health, like I talked about, right, looking at that exercise levels, and all those things that yoga for me was a huge saving grace along with therapy, I stopped therapists and therapists, as a therapist, we all need to therapy and yoga was such a saving grace for me when I was just going through a lot a few years ago. And it just, it was something that just completely shifted, I was able to get into my body and understand where I was holding things. So I wanted to create a space, just like I was able to heal, for other people’s to do for other people to do the same thing, right. So to be able to whatever modality they were going to pick to be able to, whether it be physical in your yoga practice, or in your holistic psychotherapy sessions, workshops, as well, where we go a little bit above and beyond do a little bit more kind of personal growth workshop. Just a space for people to have different different modalities and ways to heal.
Christine Gautreaux 16:23
Oh my gosh, so, yes, and it’s beautiful. Oh, wait, I wanted all of us, not just me, hang on. I’m messing with the, uh, messing with the the thing for people who are listening, I’m now showing the website of brave wellness studio.com. So Denise, I have to ask this attack Italy, wellness retreat, two spots left, register now, please tell our
Denise Alba 16:51
listeners. Oh, man, I love travel. I think travel is a big part of really getting to know yourself in a different space, right? Because when you go to a different country, and you don’t speak your language, for example, how does that feel for you, and what’s your growth going to be like to connect with others or to pick up on their culture and things like that, but traveling is a big part of my own healing as well. So I wanted to create a wellness retreat for people to go and relax, but you also get to know themselves in a different space. So we’re gonna have yoga daily yoga, meditation, personal growth workshop, we’re also obviously going to do wine tasting Italy, we’re gonna go and just enjoy our time while also feeling I feel like when you’re relaxed, you’re able to go a little bit deeper into, you know, the trauma or the issues that you’re dealing with. And so having this space curated to really be relaxing for people to go in there and say, Okay, I’m ready to do a little bit more work, right? Whether it’s just stretching a little bit more, and that release is something in them, then we can have, you know, a coaching session or whatever that may be, but it’s, it’s gonna be beautiful.
Christine Gautreaux 18:05
What are the dates on?
Denise Alba 18:07
Whoever wants to come?
Christine Gautreaux 18:09
Meet? Who What are the dates on that trip?
Denise Alba 18:13
September 25, through October 1 of this year.
Christine Gautreaux 18:16
So you have time there’s two spots left. We’ll put the link in our show notes. If Italy is in your future, I want some comments that Courtney said, she said, I’ve studied psychology, so I knew what to expect I protected my feelings in our professional relationship.
Shannon M. 18:34
Yeah. And it makes I’m sorry, Christine. Go ahead. Go ahead. And it makes sense, right, Courtney like to understand where somebody is coming from, but just like Christine, right, Christina and I have a beautiful relationship. We have honest conversation sometimes. And actually, we need to talk about some stuff, Christine, I feel like I need to apologize to you about some comments that I made. And just going back and making sure that you’re being mindful of what you say and how you say it and where it’s coming from. But for me, even if this person is of a different race, again, if I’m paying my money, I want to know that you’re trained to be able to handle it. I don’t want to assume that just because you’re not black, that you’re not educated on a trauma informed response and are able to help me through those things. You know, just like cancer, not all doctors have had cancer before, but they’re educated and they’re prepared to help you through the different parts and ways that you need support and the resources that you need. So I hear you on being wise and the boundaries, I think that’s necessary when you’re no you’re in that situation, especially when we’re talking about mental and emotional well being. But for me again, that’s when I want to say okay, if I can’t talk to you about this, and this is supposed to be my space where I can talk about everything. I need to find somebody else to be that person for me, or if anything I feel like it’s just gonna perpetuate me not being able to use my voice and not feeling safe to really put everything On the table and get the help that I need.
Christine Gautreaux 20:04
Yeah, I want to build on that Shannon, because when I was going through my graduate level internship, I was doing work with a children’s assessment center in Houston, Texas, it is a fabulous facility that works with survivors of sexual abuse. And I what I learned through that experience is not all therapists can talk about sex, and not all therapists can talk about sexual abuse. So it’s the kind of it goes along with the same thing. Not all therapists may be trained to talk about race and racism. And, and that is an important part of healing and the the not only the danger of racism, but the everyday trauma that is that people are impacted with.
Shannon M. 20:49
And the nice, that’s one of the reasons I wanted to reach out to you, when I saw your, your studio and everything that you’re doing online, I said, she’s got to come up and talk about everything she’s working on. Because me as an honor student, going straight through high school and college and getting the degree in psychology, I know, it’s really easy to be in your head about stuff. And so what you said about getting into your body and seeing where you hold stuff is so important.
Denise Alba 21:14
I think that’s what we’re not trained to do that right. And especially as women, it’s like, You’re too emotional and stop, you know, all of this, you know, stuff. So it’s one of those things of No, get back into it. What is it saying? Where were you holding a lot of your moods or emotions that needs to be released? You know?
Shannon M. 21:33
Absolutely. And that’s the part for me, Christine, we always talk about the part of the definition that speaks to us, right? It’s the decision making skills for me this week, right? I think about what is it, Laura? The I think it was thinking grow rich. And he was talking about how long people take to make decisions. And when I read that, I said, You know what, you’re right. And I started making decisions so much quicker. And so if I know how somebody something makes me feel emotionally, or I’m looking at my boundaries, or my goals for myself, and I say, this doesn’t really align. Next is the decision making is so much easier because I’m paying attention to my mental and emotional wellness.
Denise Alba 22:15
Yeah, and you’re trusting in yourself that sounds like as well to be able to make that which a lot of people can’t, they haven’t maybe sat in it enough to be able to feel like oh, this is I can trust that emotion. And that’s the work that we do. Yeah,
Christine Gautreaux 22:30
we call it inner authority. And I want to lift up real quick, y’all. Jennifer house listening from Austin, Texas says this is a great conversation, and I’m loving this. And brandy Lee, it says this is another great combo wish this one could be in person Interplay style meet. Randy. Denise interplay is a modality I use in my work that uses movement and storytelling and voice. So it’s about integrating our whole selves. So like, you are totally talking my language, when we’re talking about what Shannon said about getting out of our heads and getting into our whole bodies. Because our bodies hold stories of trauma and happiness and wellness. And so many times we don’t access them, we just access, you know, what we see or hear or what society tells us we’re supposed to be doing. Yeah,
Denise Alba 23:20
right. Another part of what we hold as well, that I think we don’t talk about a lot or enough is really also the ancestral, you know, things that we hold in there cultural and all that stuff, too. Because sometimes, you know, we don’t even know where it’s coming from. And it may not even be hours, it could be from learned behavior or, you know, things like that. So also looking a little bit deeper than just ourselves even.
Christine Gautreaux 23:45
Right. And having that conversation. We’ve talked about it a lot on the show, because I do a lot of anti racism work in the community. And talking about as white folks like, we got to look at that we got to look at that ancestral line and what were our ancestors doing? And you know, Rasma Minikin talks about there’s a lot of trauma in white people’s bodies, as well as people of colors, bodies, and it’s different trauma, but it’s still trauma, and we all need to heal, we all need to look and find out what is coming through us that may be unconscious that we’re not that that’s currently affecting our emotional and mental health.
Shannon M. 24:28
Mm hmm. Yeah, absolutely. And when you when you ladies talk about the trusting yourself and having to learn it, you know, I’ve really had to, to work through those things. And it was from my mom being sick, you know, I didn’t know her for 12 years. And I met her right before I graduated high school. And a few years later, she got sick, in this job running around working all these hours, working through micro aggressions, all this different all these different things that we talk about, and I’m thinking about stepping down and I was struggling with it. You know, I said, Well, which one is more important? You know what I mean? Like you might be running out of time, are you really about to give away your time and the things that you want for your life? But it’s, wait a minute, what do I want for my life? What should this look like, you know, and I’m so glad that I did it. And things happen for a reason. But especially as women, that’s what we’re taught to give away our time, give away our bodies for everybody else. But us, you know, even as women, no matter who our partner is, our bodies are for our partner or for our children. It’s for everybody else, but me and how I feel and what I need to be the highest version of myself.
Denise Alba 25:33
Right. It’s so easy to put ourselves last and you know, subconsciously, even like you said, and so it’s really important for us to have these conversations and remind, you know, even ourselves to stop and check in and proceed. Yes, yeah.
Christine Gautreaux 25:51
And especially for women, and what I call helping professionals, you know, the folks that are holding space for other people in addition to themselves and their families and their world. I think it is, I don’t really want to say doubly I think it’s Tripoli important because we are so used to not that I think, I can’t tell you how many stories I have of clients, friends, colleagues, myself, that didn’t stop until there was a health crisis or a crash in our body said, you have to stop and we want to change that narrative. We want to be proactive, we want to know ourselves well enough to not get to that point, you know, absolutely. Yeah, it was
Shannon M. 26:40
really interesting what you said before the the live Christine about how a lot of times when entrepreneurs and and different people are doing their wellness launches of their books or their their products or their their trips right to Italy. That’s when their health deteriorates. And it’s been so interesting. I’ve been on the news in the past two weeks working with scared they had their final did a great job with the branding. I’m super excited. And I’m in urgent care twice. You know what I mean? Because I’m having an emergency stuff because I don’t have what I need and haven’t taken the time to make the doctor’s appointments to be preventative. So now you have an emergency, and let’s go ahead and take care of it, you know, so, thankfully, on this scale, it is not nearly as bad as it could have been. But I’m paying attention to stuff like that, like, make sure that you keep your habits as everything is still going on or everything’s gonna have to stop.
Denise Alba 27:36
Yeah, I was gonna ask you did you did you notice those warning signs? Or was it just was it too late?
Shannon M. 27:41
So I would say definitely not too late. One thing was my thyroid was swollen one day at work, right? And I was eating, it hurt a little bit. But again, I’m running a three story venues. So the majority of the shift I’m not eating, I’m talking to guests, talking associates, running around helping everybody else. At the end of this shift. I’m trying to eat some cheese, it’s right. And I do a scale of one to 10 for pain and literally like, agonizing. I’m trying not to like make a scene in the office. I’m just gonna go home and drink some water, drink some green juice, I got home couldn’t even swallow the green juice. My partner was like, let’s go to urgent care. We need to go right now. You know, and that was from my wisdom teeth. I was told years ago, I’d have to take them out. Trying to be stubborn, didn’t want to have to do it didn’t you know I want all my teeth and the thyroid was like, No, you need to take it out. So my gum was swollen. I didn’t have I don’t think I saw any warnings or anything before that. But the thyroid swollen for over 12 hours was warning. And from that I decided to get the wisdom teeth taken out even though they didn’t say this is absolutely what it is. I know that I had already been told to do that. So I decided to stop being stubborn. Right second trip was my chest has been kind of tight and just get in sharp pains every now and then, you know, but recently again, got another promotion. I’m working 14 hours on Valentine’s Day leaning over boxes, counting stuff. And as a woman who’s not 30 yet I’m surprised I’m having to stand up and change my posture because I’m in a little bit of pain. You know, so at the doctor’s office for my wisdom teeth, of course they’re asking about everything else and he said it’s good that it’s not under you know under your breasts on the side, it’s on top but you still need to get that checked. So after a busy shifts, I felt some pressure I said let me go ahead and listen. Before I really have to sit down and so again I did the EKG it came back clear, but I know I still felt tightness and so I still stood out for that day of work and had been resting and got some sun on the beautiful day the other afternoon and was out in the sun getting recharged and drinking my water and hydrating and it’ll be you know, it’ll be fun from there. But yeah,
Denise Alba 29:58
but taking that preventative care even those shifts right making sure that you are taking those breaks because that’s your body letting you know Hey, girl, oh down give me give me some water not just cheese it
Shannon M. 30:14
something absolutely
Christine Gautreaux 30:16
I’m glad you called her on the cheese it’s gonna try not say anything but I want to be hypocritical because when I was her age, it was Cheez Its and Dr. Pepper. When at my first full time job when I remember it, my husband says remembering Cheez Its are a long memory ago, my body tells me very clearly a long time ago, no, no. But I do have fond memories of them. But my body was not a fan, that’s for sure.
Denise Alba 30:46
Snacks. Right? Even if I don’t take those breaks,
Shannon M. 30:51
or break, yeah, and I build it in and I bring my lunch faithfully every day, you know, so Craisins, and we’re kale and quinoa and barley, and I am moving it back to the left, I was vegan, and that’s how I lost a lot of weight. And so yeah, we’re gonna, we’re gonna bring it back, because it needs to be more alkaline. And I know it affects the mental and the emotional to like we’re talking about.
Denise Alba 31:14
And I’m glad you’re being honest. Because I feel like that’s our society to like, go go, go, don’t take breaks, finish the project, blah, blah, blah. And that is why we have such high, you know, anxiety and depression in our society. And it’s like, hello, maybe we need to slow down, maybe we’re not doing things the way that we should be. So I’m glad that you, you know that you’re honest about that? Because it’s hard. Yeah.
Christine Gautreaux 31:38
And being gentle and compassionate with yourself. Because the reality is, is it affects so many people, like stress is, you know, they’ve done the studies on it, like stress and doing too much can take you down. And so that checking in with your body and listening. Thank you for listening. Yeah, absolutely.
Shannon M. 32:00
And, you know, we and I’m so glad that we talked about it. And we say that you teach the things that you need to make sure you apply it the most, right. So thinking about all the dimensions, going back to work after COVID All these things have happened. I think about the fact that it’s been a while since I’ve been a salary manager. So now that I’m back, I’m being careful to not reapply the habits that I used to have, because that’s how it was your kitchen manager. Kitchen managers usually don’t eat, you know, I mean, they’re making sure everybody else eats, they’re not taking their breaks and things like that. So I’ve been really intentional about it. And I think it’s gonna be good.
Christine Gautreaux 32:38
Okay, well, showing other people how to take care and be well, and I mean, I think it’s going to take all of us, you know, as women to say, Okay, enough, we’ve been taking care of everybody else. And we’re showing you how we take care of ourselves, and then we get to sustain and take care of everybody else. But y’all this is I know, I’ve said it on the show before, but I will say it, I’m just going to keep saying it. Caregiving is dangerous. And it is very true that people often die before the people they’re taking care of because they are not taking care of themselves. And women who are taking care of children who are taking care of elders who are the sandwich generation and taking care of both or professional caregivers. You know, I was on the phone with somebody last week that told me of somebody who passed too early. And a lot of it’s preventable and but we need you we need you to take care of yourself. So you can still be here and sharing your wisdom and sharing your light in this world. Yes. Oh, like going on this trip to Italy and Italy wellness retreat. Amazing, right? I like
to talk about this after I also Denise I want to ask you where the name of your studio came from. Right? Yeah, do do
Denise Alba 34:04
your make me cry? This is a good one ready? I was talking about opening the business and I when I get when I get like scared or many of us right but when I get scared or frustrated I cry and so that’s my energy release and I sometimes I hate it because it’s like no not not that I’m just angry or I just need to get the energy out right and people are like oh my god, are you okay? I’m like I’m fine. Just let me cry. And so I was sitting and talking with my mom and we were having deficits Oh, which is coffee and Spanish. having coffee and breakfast together conversing and just catching up and I was telling her about this. This thing that I may be doing right and and I just started crying because I was holding so much fear. And I was like oh my gosh, I can’t do this. I want So I have the idea and all this stuff. And my mom, mind you, she’s beautiful soul. And she speaks English, but she doesn’t have, you know, this huge vocabulary. And she comes up to me and hugs me and says, You are so brave, you can do anything. And first of all, you and you would know that my mom knew the word brave. So that caught me off guard. And, you know, several weeks later, when I was deciding what I was going to name it, I was like, brave, we are all brave. And it took my mom, you know, pushing me and saying, You’re so brave, you can do anything and her crying and me crying, everything’s gonna be fine, you know, to be able to come up with what I wanted others to feel as well is that you can walk in cry, you can walk in feeling scared, but you’re going to be supported, you’re going to be uplifted, you’re going to be given the tools to walk out of here, brave. That’s right.
Christine Gautreaux 35:54
I love that origin story, Denise, thank you for sharing, and our listeners. Well, and I do think it’s brave to take care of yourself. In a society that often ask us not to, you know, whether that’s our bosses or our work schedules like it is. It is brave to say, No, I’m going to take this time and go in for this yoga class, I’m going to go and take time and go to my therapist. I was looking at something on Instagram the other day, and it was talking about y’all, you can get accommodations at work for therapy. Like, yeah, if you will you you speak to this. Denise, will you tell our listeners about that? Yeah, well,
Denise Alba 36:39
I mean, one of the biggest one that’s coming up for me, because it happened earlier today, when my clients like I can’t take time off for the session or set it that kind of way. And I was like, Well, I can give you a note. And that is we’re considering this umbrella as doctors that time. And so I was like, I can give you a note for you to get out. They have to allow you, you also do not have to tell them where you’re going. As long as it’s for your health, which is mental health is health. Hello, when did we forget that our brain is are attached to our bodies, it is held, right. And so that is one piece of it that you can take out our work, not that you’re doing it every single day, but that you can take out to go to your therapist, you can also get accommodations, depending on you know, diagnoses and things like that, in order to take some time off of work if you’re, if it’s affecting because of stress and things like that, and you need some time off. It’s something to talk about, you’re there with your therapist, and your work about. So many accommodations can be had.
Christine Gautreaux 37:36
Right. And that’s something a lot of people don’t know. But a lot of workplaces have no you like you said you’ll have to have the note you may have to fill out the paperwork. But mental health is health. And we can be proactive and not lose our jobs and not you know, and be able to say and be able to take care of ourselves. And we’re in the we’re in 2022. So a lot of therapists have evening appointments or weekend appointments or ways online appointments like insurance, if you are lucky and privileged enough to have insurance, like insurance paid for online sessions for the last two years. And some of them aren’t going back like some of them are allowing it to continue because I realized, I don’t know y’all. For me, it was so easy to click on. And versus driving and be you know, it was awesome. Awesome. And there’s even apps now that help connect you with folks to support your mental and emotional health.
Shannon M. 38:37
And that is specifically how I was talking to the therapist at the beginning of COVID was through better help and the app and it was great, you know, it was really convenient. She was able to reach out even after our sessions had stopped and check on me which I appreciate it. And it’s a great tool, you know, especially depending on where you are financially. And I love that Denise is crazy. I have a psychology degree and am today years old finding out that I can get a note from my therapist, and it’s excuse time off work. So it’s important.
Denise Alba 39:07
Yeah, yeah. Your health so that way as well. You know, like, you’re going to take time off and go see a doctor if you have a broken bone, right? Why don’t we do the same thing when we have a broken heart? Or we have, you know, our anxiety is up through the roof or whatever. We tend to just say, Oh, no, I’m fine. I’m fine. Just because we can’t see it. People can’t see what it feels like doesn’t mean that it’s not something you shouldn’t seem to so yeah, definitely. Absolutely.
Christine Gautreaux 39:33
Part of the nice oh, go go Shannon.
Shannon M. 39:36
I was gonna ask you about your apple. Lita, Denise, part of your story about the importance of wellness in your life, especially with women connecting and wisdom. I love that your mom is part of the story part of the the name of your studio. What about how involved your grandmother was?
Denise Alba 39:52
Yeah, my grandma so I was raised by a strong group of women, my Abuelita my mom and my aunt And they, they’re just fundamental to everything that I do, and specifically with my wife that she always was kind of like that lady that was in the block that people would come to if they had stomach pains or needed to, you know, get their back suggested, like, zero education. But this lady was so intuitive that she knew which herbs was going to help your belly or how to, you know, whatever it is an ailment that you had just she was so intuitive, obviously passed down from generation. And so I grew up with, you know, the teas instead of medication, obviously, Western medication, I’m not shooting that down, I also take that as well as needed. But if we could, you know, my grandma would always say, if we can give her a little, you know, cinnamon semi, or whatever that may be to help her with her belly, I had a lot of stomach issues still do somatic for anxiety. But it’s, it’s just really cool to see how all of that shaped to where I’m at now, where, as an integrative therapist, really working on integrative medicine and holistically is, you know, helping people and saying, Okay, well, let’s look at melatonin for sleep versus your, you know, sleep medication, talk to a psychiatrist, we can work together and just all these things that now play such a role to help other people. It all stemmed from grandma giving me tea, and introducing me to that.
Christine Gautreaux 41:23
No, I love the end indigenous wisdom, right? That we don’t that we can combine all of it like that we don’t, it doesn’t have to be so binary and either or like that we can look at the whole system and see what we need individually. Exactly. Yeah. I love that. Denise, we asked all our guests usually, what are some of your wellness practices that keep you going? You are a business owner, you’re a psychotherapist, you’re a daughter, granddaughter, like, what do you do for yourself for wellness,
Denise Alba 42:01
exercise, that is my I have to every single day, whether it is weightlifting, yoga, cycling, walking, whatever it is that day, but I have to have to have to get at least 30 minutes daily of exercise, moving my body getting into my body. And people know that it’s not for anything, but for my anxiety is what I always say is sorry, I have to take this classroom anxiety, and it really does, you know, kind of set my day up for success because I’ve moved the energy around and now I can, you know, be really in tune to the other things that I have to do. So that’s definitely one of them. Eating healthy. And I know after you know what I just said, my stomach pains and things like that I know what I can and cannot eat, and I just gotta listen to my body. So eating healthy, right? And also therapy. I got to go to therapy every once in a while and get also myself in a good faith, journaling and cleansing, if you will.
Christine Gautreaux 43:05
I love that. I highly recommend that I supported 100% Denise like I had my therapy session today. I’m like, you know, as healers and caregivers and people that take care of other people, we have to have people that hold space for us. And it can hear it all and that can hold it because there’s so many things like from confidentiality and things that we you know, that we can’t share with somebody else. Unless it’s a confidential space. So yeah. Oh, good conversation, y’all. Yes, she any other questions? Any other thoughts?
Shannon M. 43:41
I mean, definitely more thoughts. We’ll just have to have another hour long podcast, you know, like, but I love it. I started taking yoga. I believe for the first time I tried it in college, and I loved it. I know that there’s hot yoga, I want to try. There’s different things I know it helps people lose weight. But again, it’s not just the vanity of looking good. It’s everything that you’re letting go when you’re letting go of the weight. So I love your work. I love what inspired you and keep going. Thank you so much for taking care of our ladies out in Los Angeles. Why isn’t Los Angeles or San Diego,
Denise Alba 44:15
San Diego, San Diego.
Christine Gautreaux 44:19
San Diego I have to give a shout out to my cousin Shannon. She is yours. She works in the public defender’s office out in San Diego. My cousin Shannon is an incredibly brilliant woman. And so give her a shout out and I should connect you to Denise because if she does your studio she needs to. So I will tell her all about you and now she would be one that would jump on that Italy wellness retreat. But there’s only a few spots left. So maybe I’ll tell her after Shannon and I have a discussion.
Shannon M. 44:52
Right. Christine? I’ve always wanted to go to a vineyard I want to go one tasting experience. Yeah, okay. Okay,
Denise Alba 45:04
good. And Italy come on if there’s no right other better place.
Christine Gautreaux 45:10
Before we finish this conversation, y’all, we need to talk about our wisdom and action for this week. So Denise, what we do is we do a hashtag called wisdom and action. And we ask our guests, if you had to hashtag anything from this conversation talking about emotional and mental wellness, what would your hashtag be that you’re going to go out and do this week?
Denise Alba 45:31
Oh, balance, main balance.
Christine Gautreaux 45:35
Right. I love that. We all need it.
Shannon M. 45:40
Yes, mine is hashtag get moving. I’ve started working out again, my goal is four times a week. So I walk a lot for work, we walk around the neighborhood, but I don’t necessarily count that as my exercise because I know I like to do a lot more targeted, you know, exercises. So hashtag get moving and hashtag listen to my body because I do want to take some things off the menu. I’m going to take the bread and the processed sugar back off. And I’m going to do it specifically based on how I feel some things I might leave on that I would have taken off before you know summon a hashtag listen to my body. Whoo, I
Christine Gautreaux 46:19
love that. Alright, mine this week is going to be hashtag stretch. Because Denise, I used to have a yoga practice every day for years. And then I was doing triathlons and I had a wrist injury. And so it got me out of my practice for a year because of my, my wrist couldn’t bear weight. And I’ve just never really got like I’ve been hit or miss. And boy yoga has been coming up a lot. And I’m like, and my loves it loves it. So I just have to schedule it and
Denise Alba 46:53
the universe thrown out at you. Right?
Christine Gautreaux 46:56
A lot. So I’m like, All right. It was me and Ronnie he for years, just every morning am yoga. That’s how I started my day. And I got to get back to that. Because yeah, it’s the benefits of that and starting our day grounded and in our bodies, I think are powerful. Thank you so much for this conversation. Y’all. This was wonderful. And grateful. We’re gonna pop you back in the greenroom. My friend. If we were in person, it would have chocolate and tea. But I hope you got yourself covered at home. Talk. Thank you so
Shannon M. 47:38
much.
Christine Gautreaux 47:40
Oh, my goodness. So good, y’all, we will put all those links for our listeners. We will put them in our show notes. And we will Yeah, before we jump my friend, anything we need to know that’s happening over at Shiloh glow for our sponsor.
Shannon M. 47:55
Not yet. I can’t tell you yet.
Christine Gautreaux 48:00
I know some really good stuff come in. Yes, I know. There’s some good stuff coming. So y’all just go to the website. Check it out what’s happening currently, and then you’ll get on the list for what’s coming soon.
Shannon M. 48:13
Yes. And what we’re working on right now actually, that’s what we can talk about. We’re so going from head to toe, right? So it’s March, we’re talking about the neck. And I love it because it’s Women’s History Month. So it really reminds me of using your voice right, protecting your voice taking care of yourself. And I was thinking about it how moisturizing your neck helps with anti aging. It’s true, you know, we can put makeup on our face it but our hands in our neck are going to show so I’m making sure that I’m using my three steps. I love it. The shallow glow glow butter that Christine has. And again, we’re gonna take care of ourselves, have those preventative, good habits on a daily basis.
Christine Gautreaux 48:53
I love it. I love it. Well, y’all you can I’ll put in the shownotes two ways to get connected with me if you want to book a session. And or if you want to check out what events I’m doing online. I got a lot of fun Interplay events happening right now talking about play and wellness and ways to be in your body. You are welcome to come and check those out. We’ll put those in the show notes. And I am just you know, so grateful to be in connection with you, my friend and continuing these conversations of wellness and health and how do we do this thing called life? You know?
Shannon M. 49:26
Yes. It’s been so helpful over the past year. Definitely, yes.
Christine Gautreaux 49:32
And just remember y’all, we don’t have to take care of ourselves by ourselves. We can do it in community community. I can say the word today All right. I think it’s that time.
Shannon M. 49:45
Yes. Okay, ladies, we will see you next week. Four what is it? Is it episode 60 Next week it is episode 60. And in the meantime, don’t forget, be well be wise people See you soon
Unknown Speaker 50:07
thanks for listening. This has been the women connected and wisdom podcast on-air live on Wednesdays at 5 pm. Eastern via Facebook and YouTube. Be sure to like, share and subscribe be part of the conversation and get connected at women connected in wisdom.com.
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